I am convinced by nothing in particular that world politics are carried out in a dark and lonely smoke-filled corner of the globe by semi-inbred ultra rich Good Ole Boys wearing hooded robes of some sort. They play a hand in everything from oil production to the latest episode of American Idol. And so it’s quite obvious to me why the goat has acquired such an undeserved reputation.

It’s because the men who run the world from dark and smoky corners much prefer the rest of us to depend on them for everything. Thus the cow, a large and expensive animal requiring lots of land has become the favored American livestock because cows are primarily owned by the Good Ole Boys. The goat, on the other hand is much more affordable and small enough to live comfortably on just one or two acres, an ideal livestock for the modest farmer, providing both meat and dairy. So ultimately the goat is a threat to the beef and cattle industry and to their conspirators.

Philosophically speaking, the goat is disdained because it is a means through which one can liberate herself from the mainstream food supply. But that is just the beginning. A small taste of freedom is never enough. If she can grow her own food, sooner or later she will learn to cook it and one day will even eat that food. Before too long she will be smarter, healthier and stronger. She will forsake her prescription drugs and daily dose of TV for exercise and natural remedies. And that my friends is just down right un-American. Well, ain’t it?